Ma Chookie jist luik at ye (sorry hullawrer) but bidin inside like a bloke in the choky! Get oot o it toot sweet or Aggie 'll nag ye. Wee gannet ye canny be slackin - get crackin! The jeely 'll heal ye. C'moan yer no goany be bonny 'f yer scrawny an wasted an pasty. Sae Jesus tae please us nae pukin ma Chookie.
(Original is Ma Mignonne, by Clement Marot)